photo 2-26

I am trying to teach my mind to bear the long, slow growth of the fields, and to sing of its passing while it waits. -Wendell Berry

The water broke on February 1.

Took me by surprise, though I sensed the time was near. It was almost as if I was denying the fact that the breaking would one day come, while also being fully aware I could not carry it anymore.

It was time.

You can only carry possibility deep within you for so long. It must be birthed…. it has to breathe. Truth be told, I was way past term and Love spoke yet again into my life, “Beloved, you’re ready.”

So here I am approaching the first day of Lent according to the calendar, but in the thick of advent in my heart and it seems right. So I am going to just flow with it and embrace the new thing Love is wanting to do within me as I go through this particular labor. I surrender.

Too often we… I… just want to hold the beautiful promise without going through the pushing, stretching, waiting, tears, pain and breathing labor requires. But you have to go through it for life.

Not sure what all of this really means for my journey or where it is leading. What I do know is that I anticipate with great joy what Love is creating & re-creating… opening and healing… in life for me right now. For the first time ever, I can say I am thankful for the breaking and hopeful. I know it may get tough and at times pretty darn ugly, but I know Love is going to let it all be beautiful.

I pray…

I listen…

I believe…

I wait…

I labor…

and I will sing.

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